Stay at Home Mom Needs Resume Tips for Returning to Work

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Mary inTampa in Tampa, Florida

54 months ago

Mopey in Springfield, Australia said: Hi All,

I've been a SAHM for 9 years now (and really two years before that was only part time when my first born was a baby)

You said you never had a recruiter look at your resume and they were happy with the layout? Shame on them. That's part of their job.

There are online jobs for typing for court reporters. There are websites for court reporters. You may be interested in scoping for reporters. It's independent contractor work. It would help if you learned Steno. You would need to buy the software. The most expensive for editing is $1,600.

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Mopey in Springfield, Australia

54 months ago

Hi Displaced, No good, I have indeed tried tracking them down over a couple of years now, to the point of even searching for someones kids (now grown) on Facebook of all places - to track down my old supervisor and regional manager.

** I'd really like to know*** Are there actually success stories here that anyone would share from long term unemployed SAHM's getting a successful placement?

This is just ridiculous - to even get a part time job in retail, one must have experience! My retail experience is even older than my administration experience.

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Tina G in Manchester, New Hampshire

53 months ago

Rivet in Alexandria, Louisiana said: Cathy,
I'm sorry about the delay. I left my email and didn't realize that someone had asked me a question here on this blog. Please let me know if you still need help. My email is <Edited by Host: Contact info removed>. I'd be more than happy to help you. Some moms just don't have the time or get a bit overwhelmed with trying to create their own resume so that is where I step in to help. If it's advice you are seeking, I'll do my best to help you. I have a myspace page if you want to check it out. <Edited by Host: Contact info removed>. :) Take care.

I am in desperate need of help with filling out applications&resumes.I am 23 and have been a stay at home mom for four years now.Before that my job history wasnt the greatest.I am in the process of getting my G.E.D. to give me more options for jobs,but I need a job fairly soon.Could you please e-mail,I would really appreciate it.Thank You,Tina.

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Allie in Philippines

53 months ago

Displaced Legal Professional in Denver, Colorado said:
One more idea for you about coming up with real, live references. References needn't be supervisors or managers. Co-workers are also valid and better than nothing - especially if one cannot track down supervisors or managers.

Hello,

Would it be okay to put in names of those co-workers even if they don't work for the same job anymore? Most actually are doing a totally different job from what we used to. Also, how would you suggest I highlight my very little work experience -just 1 year- and some volunteer work? Would it be beneficial for me to put in lots of my responsibilities to overshadow the lack of experience?

I got a job at a hospital for almost a year after graduation and had to resign after giving birth to take care of my little one, hands-on full-time. It has been over a year since then and now that my mom is here to take care of her I wanted to go back to work. I've started on a functional resume like you've suggested over and over in this forum (thank you so much on the advices, by the way) but now is at a standstill on the work experience area. I really am at a loss as to what to write and I believe you can help me. Googled for some tips but I need more info.

Thanks!

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Jenn in Fort Collins, Colorado

52 months ago

Carla in Dallas, Texas said: Please don't think of this as spam. I am truly trying to help. I wrote a page and put it on my site about re-entering the workforce.

www.professional-resume-example.com/returning-to-the-workforce.html

It might offer some guidance to some of you. If you are also looking to juice up your resume, there are two formats you might want to consider: functional and combination. They highlight your skills more than your date(s) of employment.

Another tip is to make sure you always send a cover letter with your resume. It's professional courtesy, regardless of the level of position you are seeking.

I hope that helps.

~Carla

THANKS CARLA!

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pamhoppes in Fowlerville, Michigan

52 months ago

Rivet in Alexandria, Louisiana said: NEED a RESUME?!...I am a new stay at home mom, but started writing professional resumes on the side. I have a masters in Human Resouces and would be glad to help fellow stay at home moms/dads who are looking to go back into the workforce. I write power resumes, so contact me for assistance. I charge about half what you'll find elsewhere, with the same quality! :) <Edited by Host: Contact info removed>

hello,
i am a stay at home mom and looking to actitively look for work. although during this time it is very hard, and even harder since I live in michigan... but I do volunteer at my daughters school and going back to school myself to finish my accounting degree. i am just having difficulty with how i should write my resume... any guidence/help would be greatly appreciated....
Pam H

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Kim in Chicago, Illinois

51 months ago

pamhoppes in Fowlerville, Michigan said: hello,
I am having difficulty with how i should write my resume... any guidence/help would be greatly appreciated....
Pam H

Go to your community college and ask if they have a career center. They help alumni and people in the local community with resumes and interview skills. It is not just current students.

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Lichi in Ashburn, Virginia

51 months ago

sandy in Sharpsburg, Georgia said: I understand your problem I'm trying to get back into the work force myself and my problem is how to write the lost time in my resume for a stay at home mom so for I'm at a loss for the job description and title to put

Hi,

When I started to work again with my 1yr old daughter, I stayed home for a year or so but I am still grieving after 8 months at work to be separating by baby now 19 months for work..

When I started I only explained the employer that I stayed home to raise my family, for the gap. I don't find the need to put anything on the Resume. You should expect that question and it should be easy to answer. Every one understands, that a women with kids has such a period in life where they prefer to stay home over working to raise a good happy family...

I love my work, but with the small kid I am still thinking to stay home again and enjoy these precious years of their childhood.

Hope you find some good job soon and be satisfied!

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georgette in Los Angeles, California

50 months ago

Rivet in Alexandria, Louisiana said: NEED a RESUME?!...I am a new stay at home mom, but started writing professional resumes on the side. I have a masters in Human Resouces and would be glad to help fellow stay at home moms/dads who are looking to go back into the workforce. I write power resumes, so contact me for assistance. I charge about half what you'll find elsewhere, with the same quality! :) <Edited by Host: Contact info removed>

Hello Alexandria, i would like your help. i have been a stay at home mom for almost 4 years. had 2 girls back to back my oldest is 2 and im going through divorce. my husband abanded us when i was in my first month into my pregnancy. he wants me and girls out of his house ASAP. so now i must find work! please help me.... thank u

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Mary inTampa in Tampa, Florida

50 months ago

He wants you and the girls out of his house ASAP???!! Go to a divorce lawyer ASAP!!!! Does he have a job? He should be moving out, not you and his children.

You need financial protection. Get to a divorce lawyer ASAP. Secure the home for you and your daughters, so he will have to move out. DO NOT MOVE OUT!!!! If he has a job he will have to pay child support - because if he doesn't, he could lose his driver's license or go to jail.

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Olivia Rivet in Alexandria, Louisiana

50 months ago

pamhoppes in Fowlerville, Michigan said: hello,
i am a stay at home mom and looking to actitively look for work. although during this time it is very hard, and even harder since I live in michigan... but I do volunteer at my daughters school and going back to school myself to finish my accounting degree. i am just having difficulty with how i should write my resume... any guidence/help would be greatly appreciated....
Pam H

List it! List any Volunteer Work...It will help show what you have been doing during your time at home!

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Olivia Rivet in Alexandria, Louisiana

50 months ago

noelle in Cupertino, California said: Hi,
Are you still in the business of writing resumes and cover letters for stay at home mom going back to work?

I am, but unable to post contact info on here....

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Olivia Rivet in Alexandria, Louisiana

50 months ago

georgette in Los Angeles, California said: Hello Alexandria, i would like your help. i have been a stay at home mom for almost 4 years. had 2 girls back to back my oldest is 2 and im going through divorce. my husband abanded us when i was in my first month into my pregnancy. he wants me and girls out of his house ASAP. so now i must find work! please help me.... thank u

Bless your heart! I would get a resume together or have one done. Let me know if you want me to look over it for you. I think someone else offered some help on your situation. Please look into that and take care of yourself and your babies. You can work on the resume afterwards.

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shntg1 in Prattville, Alabama

50 months ago

I am returning back in the work file from being an stay at home i need a little direction getting started in the job files.Please can someone help me get started.I really need a job.

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Karen in Morgantown, Pennsylvania

50 months ago

AM I REALLY READING YOUR COMMENT RIGHT? "He wants you and the girls out ASAP" PLEASE Unless you and/or your girls are in serious danger NEVER EVER LEAVE YOUR HOME!!! Get an attorney and file an emergency petition to have him removed...Stand up for yourself and your girls. QUOTE who="Mary inTampa in Tampa, Florida"]He wants you and the girls out of his house ASAP???!! Go to a divorce lawyer ASAP!!!! Does he have a job? He should be moving out, not you and his children.

You need financial protection. Get to a divorce lawyer ASAP. Secure the home for you and your daughters, so he will have to move out. DO NOT MOVE OUT!!!! If he has a job he will have to pay child support - because if he doesn't, he could lose his driver's license or go to jail.

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Pamela in Long Beach, California

50 months ago

The problem these days, because of the competition for every available job, is that even temp agencies won't take you if you haven't had 3-5 years of recent, paid, fulltime experience within the last x number of years, and they state that flat out, just to keep down the number of applicants for each position. I get told that every position doing anything gets like 1,000 applications. It feels as if the current job market is purposely discriminating against women who for whatever reason haven't worked full time recently. It's almost easier for prisoners and people fresh out of high school to "re-enter" the job market; in fact, whenever I use the term "re-entry" it's just automatically assumed that I must mean ex-felon. (Now maybe that's racism too, as I am an American Indian saying it and when people see me they must be assuming I mean that instead of homemaker...?!)
Then, too, maybe it's just because I'm in California. There must be some part of this country where having been a homemaker isn't seen as some kind of career suicide; i.e. where women DO stay home once either engaged or married. Maybe the South? Where family values are more important?? Maybe I should move to some part of the country where my having been a homemaker won't be seen as some kind of crime worse than being an ex-prisoner is? Even with TEMP AGENCIES. I'm even hearing from temp agencies that in order to get a temp assignment you have to have had at least 3 years on your last job. And I've been a homemaker and an agency temp all these years...how is one supposed to come up with a whole 3 years' on one assignment that way?!?!

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Pamela in Long Beach, California

50 months ago

Vicque Fassinger said: Another way to design your resume is to write about your other jobs nd responsibilities WITHOUT putting any dates on the resume; this way, there is no time gap. The point of a resume is to get noticed - to get an interview (whether over the phone or in-person). Once you've gotten their attention, then you can explain you've been this amazing creative coordinator of kids' activities for years! Putting THAT on your resume FIRST may not be as effective. Again, effective = getting a response!

If you don't put dates the resume will get trashed...they get 1,000 applications for every opening and they will simply not read it.

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Pamela in Long Beach, California

50 months ago

Mopey in Springfield, Australia said: Hi All,

I've been a SAHM for 9 years now (and really two years before that was only part time when my first born was a baby)

My reference people and the companies themselves no longer exist, though I do have two written references - old as they are. I managed to get a temp typist job for a few weeks last year (scattered over a few months)and hired through a freind of a freind of a freind, and this lady is willing to be a reference so at least that is something. So depressing that recruitment managers don't consider a written refence any good any more. I've been told that recruitment staff won't even look at your resume if you've been out of work for five years or more. If only they could focus on the work that I HAVE DONE to see I am qualified.

I'm targetting part-time administration work and have had NO luck at all and am starting to become so discouraged. I did get to interview level for one position and asked for feedback. I was told I did very well and would have been 2nd choice but it came down to the other lady having had more RECENT experience :(

I've even had my resume looked at by a recruitment specialist who said she was happy with the layout and contents of my resume and how I have explained my absence from work and listed my volunteer work and duties. Employers don't even seem to have the manners to send a rejection letters these days, you just don't hear a thing!

What am I supposed to do? No one will take a chance it seems. I've even tried applying for entry level junior positions and not a nibble :(

This is exactly what I'm talking about.

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Luminari in Denver, Colorado

50 months ago

If you're looking for references for your resume, try LinkedIn. I found out about this website attending various workshops. I've been a SAHM for the past 7 years and have to get back to the workforce. I registered with my county workforce agency. They offer free self-directed labs in all the most recent computer software and workshops such as "Rezume your Resume" and "Work Skills". As a SAHM these helped me really validate and appreciate all the work a SAHM is responsible for. They helped me list and organize it all in a Functional Resume. I do have a B.A. and M.S. and I too was worried about the GAPs in my work history, but this agency really helped me sell my SAHM duties and now I have a job!! A real job in my field!! I asked them what sold them on me and they said how I really played up my SAHM responsibilities and how those skills transcend the workforce. So don't give up all you wonderful SAHMs!! We're all important with the most important, underappreciated jobs in the whole world!! If it wasn't for us, all those CEOs wouldn't be where they are now!! Good luck to everyone!!

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rebecca in Dublin, California

50 months ago

Hi, I decided to be a stay at home right after I graduated from college with a degree in business administration with an emphasis on international business. I'm debating whether or not to have a second baby as this will put me out of school for another 6 years. I graduated in December 2006. What should I do in the mean time as far as classes to make myself more marketable when the time comes for me to go to work? Keep in mind, I have NO work experience whatsoever. I worked while I was in college as a waitress and then later on doing data entry, but nothing in the field I majored in. This was a huge mistake on my part and I know it's going to be difficult to find a job without any experience and being out of school for so long now. I want to get internships when the time comes, but I'm not sure who will hire me if I'm not currently in school. Also thinking of getting my mba. What should I do????

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Mary inTampa in Tampa, Florida

50 months ago

Rebecca, the economy is so bad - it probably doesn't matter what you do. What kind of work do you WANT to do? That's really what is important.

You're thinking about having another baby. What about pre-K right now. You have to check with the State of Florida website and find out what classes are needed. I think you can take them on line.

You also qualify to be a headstart teacher or substitute teaching. You get a Masters, you can make some really big money, and have pleasant work hours.

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Rebecca in Dublin, California

50 months ago

Mary inTampa in Tampa, Florida said: Rebecca, the economy is so bad - it probably doesn't matter what you do. What kind of work do you WANT to do? That's really what is important.

You're thinking about having another baby. What about pre-K right now. You have to check with the State of Florida website and find out what classes are needed. I think you can take them on line.

You also qualify to be a headstart teacher or substitute teaching. You get a Masters, you can make some really big money, and have pleasant work hours.

well I really want to go a jon within the field I graduated from, Im not sure what kind of classes will keep me up to par though. I've thought about writing classes or maybe even computer classes to freshen up on the basics but I'm not sure. Also I need to take the GMAT which I've failed once already. Hopefully the prep classes can get me to pass it and I can start on my masters. Many programs won't accept you without job experience though so I'm right back in the same boat as before!!

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Lindsay H. in Chester, Virginia

50 months ago

[Jewels in Anniston, Alabama"Hi Jewels,
I am a 33 year old stay-at-home mom of two children, a 18months old and a 32months old for the past almost 4 years. Prior to me becoming a stay-at-home-mom, I was a Asst. Microbiologist for a Public Health Laboratory. I am currently looking for work but I am having problems with prospective employers due to the gap in my resume. Do you have any advise as to what to do or include in my resume that can account for the almost 4 year gap?

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Pamela in Long Beach, California

50 months ago

Lindsay H. in Chester, Virginia said: [Jewels in Anniston, Alabama"Hi Jewels,
I am a 33 year old stay-at-home mom of two children, a 18months old and a 32months old for the past almost 4 years. Prior to me becoming a stay-at-home-mom, I was a Asst. Microbiologist for a Public Health Laboratory. I am currently looking for work but I am having problems with prospective employers due to the gap in my resume. Do you have any advise as to what to do or include in my resume that can account for the almost 4 year gap?

In this economy, the paper-screeners look more closely for gaps. There's nothing you can do about it. You should add homemaker in there somehow to cover the time gap or else they will assume that the gap they see must be prison. I am not kidding. They assume the worst and not the best. These days, people don't assume housewife if you're a woman, they will assume prisoner anyway. It's that bad out there. Put your education and your best job from way back when, first and foremost. On the first page, the top, whatever.

Of course, take this with a grain of salt; for me it is probably mostly because I am Native American that people automatically assume my "gap" must be prison instead of homemaker. So that's not going to be true for all displaced homemakers.

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Charisse in Alpharetta, Georgia

49 months ago

Hello Di - Would you be so kind to forward me a copy of your resume you mentioned. Thank You -Charisse 2004tripletmom@bellsouth.net

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Anne in Wilmington, North Carolina

49 months ago

I just located a book that great reviews and ordered it from Amazon Called "Back on the Career Track" By Carole Cohen and Vivian Rabin.

Check it out.

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Tracytay in Blacksburg, Virginia

49 months ago

Thank you Back-to-work
your point is well taken, not only must my resume send the message that I am ready to return to work, But I must "look" like I am ready and up to the job. Loosing the 20+ pounds and taking care of my appearance will help with regaining my confidence and self-decipline. Thanks for your comments.

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kelly in Cleveland, Tennessee

49 months ago

Hi. I am a stay at home mom and have been off and on for the last 20 years. My question is this. How do you write a resume that puts a positive spin on being out of work since 2004 and the last 3 jobs before that were only a few months long. I do have a good reason for not having a job. I am the caregiver of a child who has disabilities and must have constant medical care that began at 6 weeks of age to present { she is now 17years}. I now feel that I can hold a full time job with caring for her since she is now more able to assume care for herself. I also have 2 other children but both of those are now adult age and caring for themselves. So how do I spin this. any suggestions?

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Adrienne Rene in Rochester, New York

49 months ago

It is not appropriate to list your time as a stay at home Mom on your resume. By all means, never list "domestic engineer". Any gaps in employment can be explained in the cover letter. While the work one does as a stay at home Mom or Dad is important, it is not appropriate for a professional resume. As a Director of Employment, I am immediately uninterested in a resume that lists that experience.

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Ndworacek in Blackwood, New Jersey

49 months ago

Do I include the fact that I am re-entering the professional workforce after taking some time off to raise my children in my coverletter?

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Lily in Centreville, Virginia

49 months ago

Like your positive attitude. I'm in your shoes now. I was a computer programmer before. Taking care of my kid for 6+ years, then divorced. I think I'm ready for a new emploer. I got a certificate, updated my resume, had it critiqed, I sent it to some emploers....But, not many response. I know they don't like the "gap" there. How long did it take you to land a full time job?
best wishes,

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AprilH in Glenmora, Louisiana

49 months ago

I have been a SAHM for 10 years. Prior to that I worked as a waitress. I do not have a college degree and am now trying to re-enter the workforce. I need to work in a school to be able to be home with my kids during the summer.
I am looking at getting qualified as a paraprofessional. Or to just find a job as a teachers assistant.
I need help with my resume, how can I make myself look good with no degree and no experience?

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Mary inTampa in Tampa, Florida

49 months ago

My sister didn't work and has no education. When she moved to Florida at about age 55 she started the certification process to be a pre-k teacher. She's doing fine. Go to your state's website, find out what the qualifications are to be a pre-k teacher. You should be able to take the courses online, and the price is very reasonable.

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IamWilling in Fort White, Florida

48 months ago

Dawn in Elkton, Maryland said: I been a stay at home my for 10 years and only have a ged eduacation. I have not done many volunteered programs. The company's I worked for have closed down so there are no reference for when I did work. My husband is very controling and did not let me go out very offen and now he has lost his job and is letting me go back to work. But since I have not worked in so long, I am not sure how to even begain my resume I have only one friend and no personal references. I have put in for a entry level jobs possiable. But I fear since he has lost his job, he will move in with his mother and leave me and my daughter with nothing since everything is in his name even what little money we have. I have no living parents or family to lean on so, I am in such a mess I can not see any light. If anyone has any ideas please let me know. I all ready know that I was dumb for letting this happen so please do not remind me. Please someone help me!

There are no easy, one answer fits all here. I am married to a woman who was in your shoes. Controlling hubby, two small children, when he left ( jailed for illegal stuff ), she had to fend for herself and her two little ones. She learned how to work, took any and every job to put food in their mouths, and didn't bother anyone in her family. She did get a lot of support and help from a local christian church. She says "God" was always the one she trusted for help. I know you will be alright, somehow, you will get help. Just keep asking, don't be ashamed to ask always for help.

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IamWilling in Fort White, Florida

48 months ago

Pamela in Long Beach, California said: If you don't put dates the resume will get trashed...they get 1,000 applications for every opening and they will simply not read it.

Just when you thought you read a great "Aha" .... tip,
someone else comes along and 'debunks it'!! :o(

Is there any "JUSTICE"?? There ought to be laws against tossing out good resumes. They should be required to send them back with little post-it notes saying what's wrong with them in their eyes.
Of course, that will never happen, I am Willing to do it for a small fee. Send them all to me :o)
( Let's see 1,000 discarded resumes a day X .25 cents each = $$$ )

YOU DO THE MATH.

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Anne in Wilmington, North Carolina

48 months ago

I would recommend you start in an entry level job full time that will pay benefits. Let them know your husband is out of work. I believe Obama is giving tax credits to those woman going back to work check at your local community college. This way you could go at night in the mean time I would contact domestic violence this is emotional abuse and see what direction they can take you. They were extremely helpful to a friend of mine.You need to be strong to get through all of this. I am sorry you have to go through all this it has to be very tough.Make sure when you get that job you set up an account only in your name so he can not control this also. I wish you very well.

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Leez in Katy, Texas

48 months ago

DeAnne in Columbus, OH said: I agree with you 100 percent. Most of the pressure to go back is actually coming from my husband. My going back to work will relieve his stress. Who cares about who will take care of the kids when they are home. Exactly why would I want to sign up for another full time job? He does not have a good track record of helping around the house.

I felt the same way too! I have not worked for over 10 years. I have held a lot of part-time jobs in the past but it seems like it doesn't make any difference if I put them in my resume since all of them are just part-time and most of the places I've worked for are now out of business! So I'm not really sure if it's worth it to even mention these jobs. I have one child that I have stayed home after given birth. I have worked two full time jobs before I got pregnant. After several years of being a SAHM, the need for extra income has been a problem and me and my husband have our share of bad arguments. I was able to build my home based business which helped in making ends meet, it's a saving grace when there's nothing left before the next payday. I am earning some but not a lot and not regular but just enough to get by. He told me I am a failure! My husband won't recognize that at all! He insist that I get a real job! He never appreciate all my efforts for taking care of our child and everything else. I have done some volunteering too. I have been insulted so many times and been taken for granted. I am mad him and now I am being forced to look for a job. Lately just had surgery and trying to get better, but the arguments still exist. I am forced to go out and get some application forms so I can prove to him that I am willing to get a job even with all my pain since I am not fully receovered yet. I am confused what I need to put in my resume and I am quite nervous what to say if I ever get called for an interview. It is a real struggle for me right now! Any suggestion, please?

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Joan in Round Rock, Texas

48 months ago

wow - i just read your post, although it was 30 months ago! thank you - really well said and an eye-opener for me. I'm a SAHM re-entering the workforce. your post is 'empowering' to me!

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Joan in Round Rock, Texas

48 months ago

Joan in Round Rock, Texas said: wow - i just read your post, although it was 30 months ago! thank you - really well said and an eye-opener for me. I'm a SAHM re-entering the workforce. your post is 'empowering' to me!
i am referring to:

Deb in Fayetteville, North Carolina

30 months ago
1st page of posts

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Lynn in Belle Mead, New Jersey

47 months ago

Patricia in Naples, Florida said: OK just like the rest I have been a stay-at-home mom for 11 years. I'm now 32 I only have a high school diploma. I did attend some fire inspector classes. But do not have the state certificate. I'm so lost not knowing how to start. Is killing me. I don't even know want I want to do. I started on monster.com you can build your resume. One of the first things they ask is Resume title.............This is me????????????????????????????????? The most scary thing is I need to find a job where I can support myself. Who will take me.....Will the army? lol

I hear you friend. I stopped working in an office 20 years ago to raise a family. I've worked some small jobs since here and there. I only have a high school diploma and I am a little nervous about getting a job. Most of my experience was straight from school working in an office. I wish you lots of luck.

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Joan in Round Rock, Texas

47 months ago

one suggestion for getting back in the workforce is to apply at temp agencies. It's free and many companies are hiring this way. it's a great way to get in the door at some of these companies and also to get some experience. That's what I plan on doing! good luck to everyone!

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Maureen in Fair Oaks, California

47 months ago

I am planning my reenty into the workforce after 12 years out as child #1 goes to college. I have worked for my husband running our family business (rentals, reconstruction, tenant mgt, mktg) for the past 5 yrs and done extensive volunteering in the schools working as an unpaid teaching assistant, running committees, teaching sunday school,and training new leaders for scout troops. How do you market these skills?

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Cheryl in Evanston, Indiana

46 months ago

To Sher:

I so agree with you...Mothers should not have to be superhuman and yet somehow things have been turned upside down. In nature, what would happen if the mother animals had to leave their offspring before they were raised or were only able to spend a little time each day with them...it would be catastrophic, yet that is what we human mothers are expected to do. It hurts our children and it hurts us.

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jobhuntress in New York, New York

46 months ago

I read through all the posts in this discussion and the stories are really painful to hear especially the ones where the husband in the driving force behind the wife seeking employment. How dare to call us failures. I've been home for 20 years though I have done a variety of part time work throughout. I so completely relate to all the feelings - from feeling like I wasted my life, to feeling like my skills don't add up to enough, to resentment, to hopelessness, you name it. I have a large array of skills and experiences and should qualify for any number of positions, but I don't have that nice, neat progressive career path that most listings seem to require. About the only thing that keeps me going is blogging brutally and honestly about my job search. Sometimes I even laugh about how ridiculous it is. I frankly don't have the faith that a lot of people have here about writing the proper resume and how to spin being at home. I really think the whole stay-at-home-mom thing is a kiss-of-death career wise. And then sometimes you do just get lucky.

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barb in toledo

46 months ago

I trying to get back to work after 4 years of being a stay at home mom. I never had a career path in the first place. Just a a bunch of different jobs from bank teller to administrative assistant. I get interviews but no offers. I not going to make excuses for being home. I got to do what alot of moms would like to do, so why am i being punished for this. I just want a good position. I don't want a career where i'm gone 12 hours a day 6 days a week and I dont want to be tethered to my cell phone. I'm sick of looking for a job and I'm sick of employers who want every waking second of my life.

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msmithfield in Arlington, Massachusetts

46 months ago

I honestly don't understand why women seem surprised that re-entering the workforce after a lengthy absence is difficult, or why they think it's their "entitlement". The economy is tough and there are a LOT of women who have chosen to stay in the work force while also raising children. You made the decision to stay home... live with the consequences of that. Organizing play dates, reading "Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?", and baking cakes for the school fundraiser, while admirable, do not equate to a "job". Try being a full-time worker and a full-time mom and tell me what it's like to multi-task! I'm not saying you shouldn't re-enter the workforce, but by all mean, have realistic expectations. Potential employers are going to want to know how you've used your brain during the years you've been out of work... not how many loads of laundry you can get through in an afternoon.

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Cheryl in Tell City, Indiana

46 months ago

We are surprised yes, that being a mother is not considered as important as other jobs or careers because it is and really more important. Nurturing a child rather than throwing them into some daycare with someone who doesn't really care about them creates a better member of society in the long run. Children need their mothers and by filling that need they are more likely to grow up without all sorts of psychological issues from being abandoned by their mother. Yes so we chose to give our children quality lives and that benefits a lot of people.

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barb in toledo

46 months ago

Well I guess its what is important to you as a person. I felt very strongly about being able to see my kids grow. its important to me to be at their games, as my parents did feel that way. I'm not expecting a million dollar salary, I dont expect to be at each and every game but I dont want to miss everything either. I did not have kids so someone else could raise them. I dont have to start at the top, that doesnt bother me. I'm looking for a positon that I can grow into, where I can devote time but i'm not given the chance because of small minded HR people who cant see past the last four years.

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msmithfield in Arlington, Massachusetts

46 months ago

You are very lucky indeed to have had the choice to dabble in both worlds. I think you have misread my posts... I'm not putting anyone down at all for wanting to return to work. What I'm saying is that women need to have realistic expectations. You cannot expect businesses to value your choice to leave the workforce. Of course there's juggling when you stay at home, but it's not juggling it all. Try working a 40-hour week, getting up extra early to make lunches, belonging to school committees (and dealing with the small mindedness of stay-at-home moms who think that 9 a.m. on Thursday at Starbucks works for EVERYONE), helping with homework while making dinner, driving to soccer/play/piano practice, folding laundry while listening to a book report. This is MY choice and I wouldn't change it for the world... but of course there are downsides. The downsides to leaving work mean that when you want to return, you have to understand that companies are not going to think that you business-fying your choice ("CEO of the household"????) counts for anything. And let me dispel this misguided accusation that because children attend daycare, their parents aren't raising them. You couldn't be more wrong. Parents are ALWAYS the biggest influence in their children's lives. Always. And you can be a good or bad parent whether you stay at home OR work... that's another choice we all have.

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barb in toledo

46 months ago

I do agree with you. I also worked full time and did the committee thing, the sports thing, the homework thing, while my husband worked second shift. I didn't stop until they were older, because that is when I felt they needed me most. The years when drinking and sex and all that stuff comes into their lives. No choice is easy. I also know that this lousy economy plays a big part in all of this. I will get a job, but i'm just totally frustrated. and I agree that it is harder to work full time and raise a family.

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