CA Judicial Council to Independant Court Interps: DROP DEAD!

Lateely there has been some misunderstanding expressed by numerous independant court interpreters regarding the role the CA Judicial Council plays in their employment as independant contractors.

The answer to that question is; NONE!
The CA Judicial Council wishes to clarify that our ONLY mission is to provide a consistant and subservient workforce for our courtrooms & judges, which is the only thing that really matters to us. Outside of that the rest of you can all drop dead. We don't care to enforce any requirements that interpreters in privately held legal proceedings such as depositions and such be certified or even competent. We don't care that scores of interpreting agencies in CA are currently utilizing non-court certified interpreters extensively and illegally. We don't care that you have to jump thru hoops every 2 years and prove you participated in at least 40 interpreter-related events even while we deny you the opportunity to do so by supporting uncertified interpreters.

We are here only to charge you fools yearly renewal fees and make sure you comply with expensive continuing education courses.

We hope this serves to put this matter to rest once and for all.

I have a question: where can I write a letter to the CA Judical Council?. I need to tell it to go fvck itself.

Thank you

Thank you for your question. The CA Judical Council is devoted to responding all questions addressed to it by ensuring that people with doubts and/or inquiries receive an adecuate response. Your questions will be answered in the order they are received. Please stay on the line and a Judicial Council operator will be with you shortly. This was not a recording.
Your estimated wait time is : 598,987,321 minutes.

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP

I have a question for the CA Judicial Council: my testicles recently became inflamed and tender during an arraignment proceeding. Can the CA Judicial Council send someone to massage them back to health for me?.

Thank you.

Thank you for your question. The CA Judicial Council can only massage the testicles of judges, district attorneys and other members of the Master Race. WE suggest you have that taken care of in the traditional manner of all you foreign lazy immigrants: consult your local witch doctor!.

Me, me! I have a question!.

How come as an court interpreter I'm obligated to take an oath swearing "to defend the Constitution" while all the rest of you azzholes run around blatently violating it by actively engaging in torture, illegal detentions, spying on citizens and kidnappings?.

Thank you for your question. The CA Judical Council -the same as ANY American judiciary entity- is a firm believer in the "do what I say not what I do" policy.

We encourage you to send us your detailed personal information in order to provide you with an all-expense paid trip to Guantanamo, Cuba for you and your significant other.

I have a question; What with the current socialization of corporate losses thru massive bailouts at taxpayer expense, the illegal foreign country invasions, the voter fraud (but not this time tho), and having to work for child molesters whom I'm forced to address as 'your honor' I find myself having to smoke more pot on a daily basis than usual just to get by while I try to make sense of all this craziness. My question is, can the CA Judicial Council provide me with a medical marijuana card?.

Thank you for the question.

The CA Judicial Council is committed to growing and consuming its own stash. We do not share nor provide others from our stock. That being said we might be able to hook you up with some Panama Red if you fill out CAJC Interpreter Form #MJ-3076-H13.

Be sure to have your credit card handy for the operator.

Yo I gotta question for ya. I was just pinched in your beautiful state while transporting a few deceased people who I helped decease myself. Now I gotta trial coming up and I need to know the names & addresses of certain witnesses that need to be told what to say. Either that or soon I'll probably be transporting more stiffs.

Anywho my questions are;
=what's the standard bribe for getting you mutts to sell me that info and
=do you take euro?

Thank you for your offer ..uh ..we mean question.

The CA Judical Council is NOT in the habit of accepting gratuities nor divulging witness information unless CAJC form IB 376-098 has been completely filled and received by us postmarked no later than 13 court days before your scheduled arraignment.

As for the standard fee in such cases we will be happy to discuss this matter with you personally tomorrow at noon under the 101 freeway overpass in Glendale. Please wear a white carnation in your lapel for ID. It is a standard policy of the CA Judicial Council to accept payment in small denomination, unmarked bills and also; we actually PREFER euro.

Mine is an ethics question. Turns out I was recently interpreting at the witness stand when I accidentally sharted (I think the bailiff could smell it too). Anyway long story short; their was a very brief recess during which the judge made me stay, so I had to wipe myself clean with the only thing available to me at the moment: our glorious state flag.

But then I seemed to remember some Standards & Ethics code that requires I should have used our national flag instead. Could you clarify please?

A very common question.

CA Judicial Council Standards & Ethics for Court Interpreters Vol. II, 3,(a)(c) subparagraph 3, line 7 clearly indicates the need to wipe with both flags when available in compliance with both state & federal regulations.

Judicial Council in Los Angeles, California said: Lateely there has been some misunderstanding expressed by numerous independant court interpreters regarding the role the CA Judicial Council plays in their employment as independant contractors.

The answer to that question is; NONE!
The CA Judicial Council wishes to clarify that our ONLY mission is to provide a consistant and subservient workforce for our courtrooms & judges, which is the only thing that really matters to us. Outside of that the rest of you can all drop dead. We don't care to enforce any requirements that interpreters in privately held legal proceedings such as depositions and such be certified or even competent. We don't care that scores of interpreting agencies in CA are currently utilizing non-court certified interpreters extensively and illegally. We don't care that you have to jump thru hoops every 2 years and prove you participated in at least 40 interpreter-related events even while we deny you the opportunity to do so by supporting uncertified interpreters.

We are here only to charge you fools yearly renewal fees and make sure you comply with expensive continuing education courses.

We hope this serves to put this matter to rest once and for all.

Independant? No wonder you rant.

California treats illegal aliens better than its own certified court interpreters.