If I saw a waiter that was overwhelmed I would be patient. If I saw they were trying I would remain patient. Its attitude that I stiff on. Like smugness or rudeness or taking customers for granted or mumbling under your breath when a customer asks for something.
Most new waiters you can tell are trying hard so you cut them some slack. I even tipped newer waiters extra because I realize how hard time there having.
Its the ones who act burntout on their job that I stiff. Its the ones who don't even try to pretend they like you. I've been on the waiter end myself- yes some customers do suck and F them let them leave.
But you can't judge a customer on their looks and just assume they suck thats what a lot of waiters do, like I didnt use enough hair gel or didnt wear my tie to dinner, and they don't know how to conceal their contempt. That is a bad waiter.
An inexperienced waiter that has a positive attitude- some customers see this and will tolerate it.
A bad customer lacks compassion for their waiter, but a bad waiter also lacks compassion for their customer. If you are not able to put yourself in others shoes you should eat elsewhere or in the waiters case you should find a new job.
The thing that gets me is waiters who think they can act smug or rude in this day and age of e-mail and mass communications. They forget how easy it is for a customer to contact their manager and their managers manager and the president of the chain.
Sorry if they were "just having a bad day" they better try to hide it if they're serving me because If I get treated with rudeness or taken for granted I start sending emails but I would never do that just because someone is starting out and makes mistakes. Its all about there attitude/demeanor.
Rude waiters should consider this: Think about if you took your mother out to eat on her birthday would you want her subjected to a rude attitude waiter ruining the occasion?