Why are there so many nasty, bitter women in this field? |
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tessie425 in New York, New York 30 months ago |
Every law office I've worked has had several women in it that are just, bitter nasty people. I remember when I first started in this field there were two women in that office that were just mean for no reason other than the fact that they could be. Now I work with an OCD freak that has to have everything done her way or all hell breaks loose. I have had to bite my tongue on so many occassions. I can't wait for the day I can just give my two weeks and get out of this place. I got a job offer a few weeks back but it was for working for 2 women attorneys and I declined because I just had a bad feeling. I know the attorneys can always be horrible, but I found I have noticed that the staff can be equally as awful. I think offices in general are just NOT FOR ME. |
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Deborah James in San Francisco, California 29 months ago |
tessie425 in New York, New York said: Every law office I've worked has had several women in it that are just, bitter nasty people. I remember when I first started in this field there were two women in that office that were just mean for no reason other than the fact that they could be. _______________________________________ While that is true in all fields; it seems worst in the legal field. I am back in school to get out of this crazy field forever after almost 30 years. There are some real B's who work in law, and not all of them are attorneys. |
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greatminds in Savannah, Georgia 29 months ago |
Some women are just that way. I don't know why some women choose to be hateful to other women. Cattiness runs amock in all fields. |
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Clare Parrish in West Palm Beach, Florida 29 months ago |
When you find out why women act like this, let me know. I have almost thirty years in this field and yes, female attorneys do live and thrive on being the nastiest, most unreasonable people in the world. Women are catty anyway, but an effort should be made not to be unnecessarily nasty. I once saw a saying on a church marquis: "Rudeness is a weak person's imitation of strength." The real question is why do they have a job? Nice women just as competent are unemployed. |
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Tyna in Denver, Colorado 29 months ago |
Even worse is a bitchy control freak man at least women can blame it on their period. Just smile at them. Nasty people hate happy people because it reminds them of how much they hate themselves. |
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Elaine62457@hotmail.com in Fall River, Massachusetts 29 months ago |
[QUOTE who="Deborah James in San Francisco, California While that is true in all fields; it seems worst in the legal field. I am back in school to get out of this crazy field forever after almost 30 years. There are some real B's who work in law, and not all of them are attorneys. i feel the same way after approx. 25 yrs - what are you going to school for? |
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Mezosub in Newport Beach, California 29 months ago |
If everyone where you worked knew you were being paid $10-$30 per hour to do work for which attorneys get paid in the neighborhood of $100-$300 per hour, you'd be bitter too. |
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Hope in Palm Bay, FL in Palm Bay, Florida 28 months ago |
Mezosub in Newport Beach, California said: If everyone where you worked knew you were being paid $10-$30 per hour to do work for which attorneys get paid in the neighborhood of $100-$300 per hour, you'd be bitter too. I am out of work, have been in the legal field for 20 years and refuse to work in that field any longer, I'd rather be poor. |
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Elaine62457@hotmail.com in Fall River, Massachusetts 28 months ago |
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Mezosub in Costa Mesa, California 28 months ago |
I was referring to attorneys' compensation. In SoCal, starting compensation for first year associates is about $130K annually, and they bill out between $250 and $350 per hour, depending upon practice area. If you assume that they need to work 2200 hours per year in order to achieve 1900 in billables, that works out to about $60.00 per hour. That's the lowest compensation they will ever receive over the course of a practitioner's career. Now, extrapolate that to a partner who has been practicing for 20 years, bills out at $500-$600 per hour, earns $250K, and still works 2200 hours per year. That works out to about $115.00 per hour. As their compensation goes up, so does their cut of what they bill out. |
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dh in Northern CA, California 28 months ago |
Mezosub in Newport Beach, California said: If everyone where you worked knew you were being paid $10-$30 per hour to do work for which attorneys get paid in the neighborhood of $100-$300 per hour, you'd be bitter too. Hi Mezosub - I left my last job in '06 at $55K. I was working for 2 named partners and 2 associates plus processing and mailing all of the client bills in addition to a little A/R and banking. I turned down an offer of $59K in '05 for a word processor/floater position. I wanted to focus on my exit from the industry at the time. While I was making that 55K, the partners for whom I worked were making roughly $350K. I thought it was outrageous that these guys were making 7x what I made. They weren't that much more than I was. These attys can't have a practice without staff members doing all the b!tchwork; yet they milk them for everything they can possibly get and give back as little as possible in return. This is no excuse to be rude and nasty, but it's a reason. I read a lot on this forum about nasty coworker secretaries and paralegals. All of my probs were w/attys and never w/staff. My experience was that the staff supported each other, and at my last firm - there were only 3 of us - we looked out for each other. Sometimes it seemed as if the secretaries banded together to support themselves against the attys, but when it came to actually standing up to an atty for a sec, I never saw that. These girls still needed to eat and pay rent. |
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JFK in East Brunswick, New Jersey 28 months ago |
tessie425 in New York, New York said: Every law office I've worked has had several women in it that are just, bitter nasty people. I remember when I first started in this field there were two women in that office that were just mean for no reason other than the fact that they could be. Are you working in a large law firm or small firm? |
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tessie425 28 months ago |
I've worked in both.... |
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happy in Colorado in Broomfield, Colorado 27 months ago |
I honestly can't believe that a secretary/legal assistant/paralegal or whatever you want to call yourselves believe that your compensation should be anywhere near what an attorney makes. Are you guys really serious? Have you gone to law school? Do you have student loans that exceed those of a house purchase? Have you taken and passed the bar exam? After being a legal secretary for nearly 30 years' -- yes, I'm proud of the title, I don't consider what I do grunt work at all. Although I still call myself a secretary, attorneys refer to me as their legal assistant, paralegal, wonder woman and one even calls me the CEO. Along with all my responsibilities and duties, I'm an office mother, priest, magician . . . I'm compensated quite nicely for my skills, knowledge, expertise and experience. If you don't like working in the legal field, then get out. If you don't like the compensation, then get out. If the attorneys, secretaries, legal assistants, paralegals, etc., are mean, rude and nasty, then maybe you should look in the mirror for the reason, or get a thicker skin. |
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BJ in Pompano Beach, Florida 27 months ago |
happy in Colorado in Broomfield, Colorado said: I honestly can't believe that a secretary/legal assistant/paralegal or whatever you want to call yourselves believe that your compensation should be anywhere near what an attorney makes. Are you guys really serious? Have you gone to law school? Do you have student loans that exceed those of a house purchase? Have you taken and passed the bar exam? Why is it that people always suggest that someone who is tired of being treated poorly by nasty people "look in the mirror" or get a "thicker skin". Why does the "nice" person get blamed for "allowing" themselves to be abused? Perhaps they just aren't cut out to be "assertive" (a nice word for being a bully), or maybe they just need their job so badly that they have no choice but to put up with the behavior that has become the norm in our increasingly narcissistic society. You clearly have never felt unappreciated or underpaid or used or abused in your 30 years of experience - and as such you are very lucky. If it doesn't bother you to be called the "CEO" on 1/4 of what your boss probably makes, then more power to you. But something tells me that since you were on this forum in the first place, you arent as happy as you claim to be |
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Ms Gucci in Hollywood, Florida 27 months ago |
Hi BJ are you a paralegal or legal secretary now? |
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BJ in Pompano Beach, Florida 27 months ago |
Displaced Legal Professional in Denver, Colorado said: Really. I meant that many people, especially those at the level of a "secretary", don't have the luxury of easily "getting out" as suggested by Happy in Colorado. Sometimes we have to put up with rude, mean and nasty people no matter how much we want to get out. I am not suggesting it is impossible, or that you shouldn't try, but when you have bills to pay and mouths to feed, it is easy to feel trapped in a bad situation. |
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BJ in Pompano Beach, Florida 27 months ago |
Ms Gucci in Hollywood, Florida said: Hi BJ are you a paralegal or legal secretary now?[/QUOTE |
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BJ in Pompano Beach, Florida 27 months ago |
Displaced Legal Professional in Denver, Colorado said: Precisely my point when I wrote "really" in my post, above. This situation is especially true if one is over fifty and in a tight market. Guess I thought the "really" was a fecicious (sp?) question rather than a statement. Note that a little wine rinses away that taste of bile at the end of the day. Just joking - sort of. All any of us can do is keep holding on and hope for better days ahead, whether employed by a jerk or looking to be employed by a jerk. Keep the faith! |
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PS in Toledo, Ohio 25 months ago |
happy in Colorado in Broomfield, Colorado said: I honestly can't believe that a secretary/legal assistant/paralegal or whatever you want to call yourselves believe that your compensation should be anywhere near what an attorney makes. Are you guys really serious? Have you gone to law school? Do you have student loans that exceed those of a house purchase? Have you taken and passed the bar exam? ====================================
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Sarah Marchese in Scottsdale, Arizona 23 months ago |
I am so glad that I am not the only person who feels this way. I entered this field 3 years ago and moved my family from Ohio to Arizona to take a job as a Legal Assistant. I did not get proper training, but learned quickly. I have worked at 3 different firms in 3 years. I have been fired from all 3, one wouldn't give a reason (so that just meant that the evil office administrator was bored with me and didn't like my new hair color), the 2nd one couldn't afford me and the last one said that I wasn't catching on fast enough, although they weren't giving me anything to do. So, I decided that this field is NOT for me and will hopefully be pass the GRE and be accepted into Grad school. I always worked with nice attorneys. So, I praise all of you who have done this and are doing this, because as my friend pointed out to me: maybe my personality is just not right for this field. Amen! I did not come to the decision lightly seeing that I could go back to school to get a paralegal certificate/ degree, but that will be a last resort. |
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Memphis BOots in Memphis, Tennessee 22 months ago |
happy in Colorado in Broomfield, Colorado said: I honestly can't believe that a secretary/legal assistant/paralegal or whatever you want to call yourselves believe that your compensation should be anywhere near what an attorney makes. Are you guys really serious? Have you gone to law school? Do you have student loans that exceed those of a house purchase? Have you taken and passed the bar exam? LOVED THAT ANSWER! |
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Donald Dickweed in Newark, New Jersey 22 months ago |
Secretarial work is ALL grunt work and nothing else. As for you liking the fact that attorneys treat you like an expendable piece of office equipment, to each his own I say. You have to do what pays the bills and take all that abuse as part of your job. Luckily for me I found a new career that has nothing to do with lawyers and the legal profession. My advice to anyone hating it is to get out and find something else fast. You will have a much happier life and feel better about yourself every day for doing it as I did. |
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Domestic Legal Underling in Severna Park, Maryland 22 months ago |
It is a pyramid scheme, almost, but as a paralegal/legal assistant, you will do a lot of the writing that the attorney will take credit for. The attorney will then write off all of your hours as non-billable. And treat you rudely. And blame you for every mistake she made, such as not reading what you prepared for her signature. |
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Elaine62457@hotmail.com in Fall River, Massachusetts 22 months ago |
what field of work are you in now? |
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Elaine62457@hotmail.com in Fall River, Massachusetts 22 months ago |
how do you get a thicker skin? |
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Domestic Legal Underling in Severna Park, Maryland 22 months ago |
As a previous poster stated, it's probably not worth developing a thicker skin. Yet I must work, so I remain. I call it perspective, and I try to develop a sense of internal superiority; to keep in mind how low and petty a lawyer must be if she cannot take any blame for anything, and must always foist the blame on me to make herself feel better. This works until I go out into the parking lot and see what kinds of cars the lawyers are driving versus my car... ah, class warfare, perhaps? What can I say? |
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mary in Tampa, Florida 22 months ago |
That's what I did, and it was hard, but I stayed until the very last minute. It's been two years and three months, and I'm still collecting UB. I've been doing substitute teaching, got a few temp jobs, so now I am collecting UB, food stamps, and when school starts back I should have my five year teacher certificate - and make $11.08 an hour as a substitute. I am also looking for tutoring - and court reporting. |
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Domestic Legal Underling in Severna Park, Maryland 22 months ago |
Displaced Legal Professional in Denver, Colorado said: So true. |
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Annette Parrish in West Palm Beach, Florida 22 months ago |
That is an everyday occurrence. Whenever I prepare a document for the attorney, I insist that they read it. Even if they don't or do what our attorney did, they cannot come back later and ream me for their error. Even if they do, you have the satisfaction of knowing the document was submitted at their own peril and gives you an insight into that person's character. |
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Marguerite in Arlington, Texas 22 months ago |
tessie425 in New York, New York said: Every law office I've worked has had several women in it that are just, bitter nasty people. I remember when I first started in this field there were two women in that office that were just mean for no reason other than the fact that they could be. Hi I know that women are hard to work with. I'm a female and I don't like working for them. I work better with men and I treat them as I would want to be treated. It stinks that the women who think they are better than the other person get by with being that way. If you report them they become even worse that before. I try to work with men because I feel equal in some areas and I would never be any thing other than my self. If Im fired because I'm true to my self then let it be. |
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Marguerite in Arlington, Texas 22 months ago |
Hi I know that women are hard to work with. I'm a female and I don't like working for them. I work better with men and I treat them as I would want to be treated. It stinks that the women who think they are better than the other person get by with being that way. If you report them they become even worse that before. I try to work with men because I feel equal in some areas and I would never be any thing other than my self. If Im fired because I'm true to my self then let it be |
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tessie425 in Staten Island, New York 22 months ago |
Marguerite in Arlington, Texas said: Hi I know that women are hard to work with. I'm a female and I don't like working for them. I work better with men and I treat them as I would want to be treated. It stinks that the women who think they are better than the other person get by with being that way. If you report them they become even worse that before. I try to work with men because I feel equal in some areas and I would never be any thing other than my self. If Im fired because I'm true to my self then let it be I recently turned down a job because it would have been working for two female attorneys. I said no thank you, even though I liked the location and the perks of the job would have been better than what I have now. I much prefer working for men and with men, less catty BS. I worked with a female partner in a large firm once and it was a nightmare. Everyone hated and was scared of this woman, and she was one of the most nasty, vile women I have ever been in contact with. |
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tessie425 in Staten Island, New York 22 months ago |
I also worked for a firm where the office manager was this nightmare woman. We used to call her Leona (Helmsley) because she looked just like her. She used to try to tell you how many inches from your knee your skirt should be. Oddly enough, when I quit that job she was very sad to see me go, even after giving me hell for 3 years. |
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Annette Parrish in West Palm Beach, Florida 22 months ago |
This reminds me of an incident that occurred back in June. I was temping at a firm that I truly liked and they liked me even the female attorneys. Well, they're just getting into the litigation aspect which I have oodles of experience in. In any event, their set up is a paralegal over the litigation team. Paralegal is a female. Sometimes people get Type A personally confused with beligerence and just plain ugly. In any event, the attorneys would give her the assignments to be handed down to the rest of us. I got most of them since I had the most experience. It came to where the attorneys began giving me the assignments directly. Of course, understandably, she needed to know what I was working on in cse she is asked about it. Well, some documents "appeared" on my desk which should have been filed at least two weeks prior. I had never seen these documents. I found them in my desk and asked where they came from. The attorney was livid because they were crucial to the client's defense and allegations made in the case. Inasmuch as she had been there longer and I was a temp, I did not say anything about her "secret" papers I found in the desk and simply asked her to clean them up. Then another incident came up where she set depositions without conferring with any of the other parties. Of course, I got the call from outside counsel reaming me out for the discourteous behavior. I went to her asking why this was done that way. She vehemently replied that she did not have to confer to set a deposition. There were twelve (12) parties to this case besides our Plaintiff. Of course, I as a temp was let go a couple of days later without explanation. |
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Grant013 in Astoria, New York 22 months ago |
Ahh....nothing like an early morning rant from a right wing, religious troll attempting to peddle his hateful propaganda via amazon.com. What a lovely way to start the day. |
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mary in Tampa in Tampa, Florida 22 months ago |
Thanks Grant. |
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Grant013 in Astoria, New York 22 months ago |
Displaced, he's a vitriolic rightwinging troll who is trying to upset the women here on this forum. He belongs in Utah in the 1890s. I HAVE to agree here about the fact that the legal field and the paraprofessional fields related to it are oversaturated with nasty women of all ages and backgrounds. I also used to turn jobs working for female attorneys. I think it's the aggressiveness of the "legal atmosphere." Attorneys are naturally over-confrontational. And it DOES rub off on you. It took me almost a year to get rid of this "rub-off" once I left paralegal. Following that, I went into the non-profit world and all levels of female hierarchy are much nicer there. I was very happy. |
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Grant013 in Astoria, New York 22 months ago |
Distemper is a condition that affects female dogs and is handled in dog training and the vet's office. Did he just call us the "b" word? |
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Britney33480 in Florida 20 months ago |
Legal secretaries can be vicious.
I remember catching them in lies. One even started following me around the office to monitor me. They wouldn't even be polite or professional. Luckily the job didn't work out. One secretary would disappear for about 30 minutes and when she came back she smelled like she had been drinking. The same girl would come to work with alcohol on her breath. The office manager did nothing about it. |
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Former Paralegal in Port Saint Lucie, Florida 18 months ago |
Just wanted to chime in here and share my experience in the legal field. I have been a paralegal for over 14 years now, and I have finally decided I've had enough and am completely changing careers (should have done that a LONG time ago). I was recently fired from my job for the most ridiculous thing ever. I heard that they were planning on laying me off a while ago, but were looking for an excuse so that I wouldn't be able to collect UIB. Well, sure enough, I got written up and subsequently fired, for mailing a document and not faxing it. I was never told to fax it, but they said "you should have known you had to fax it." Are you effin serious? I'm supposed to be a mind reader now? Needless to say I fought back and tried to stick up for myself, and got fired for it. I also had the most mean, miserable, nasty and bitter office manager ever. Unbelievable. I have never received the respect I deserved in this field, and so I am exiting it while I still have some dignity left in me. Just the thought of leaving this field behind is like a huge load that has been lifted! |
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Former Paralegal in Port Saint Lucie, Florida 18 months ago |
Just wanted to chime in here and share my experience in the legal field. I have been a paralegal for over 14 years now, and I have finally decided I've had enough and am completely changing careers (should have done that a LONG time ago). I was recently fired from my job for the most ridiculous thing ever. I heard that they were planning on laying me off a while ago, but were looking for an excuse so that I wouldn't be able to collect UIB. Well, sure enough, I got written up and subsequently fired, for mailing a document and not faxing it. I was never told to fax it, but they said "you should have known you had to fax it." Are you effin serious? I'm supposed to be a mind reader now? Needless to say I fought back and tried to stick up for myself, and got fired for it. I also had the most mean, miserable, nasty and bitter office manager ever. Unbelievable. I have never received the respect I deserved in this field, and so I am exiting it while I still have some dignity left in me. Just the thought of leaving this field behind is like a huge load that has been lifted! |
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Donald Dickweed in Perth Amboy, New Jersey 18 months ago |
Great!!! I applaud your decision and your luck. I hope you learned NEVER to enter back into the legal field after that experience. I got out over a year ago and have never regretted it. Lawyers, office managers, and generally people that work in the legal field are the biggest @#$@#$@# you could possibly work for. When you enter the corporate world, the difference is larger than night and day. You will never feel sorry that you aren't in the legal field; even working at a supermarket or in retail is better than dealing with nasty, self-centered @@#### that exist in the legal market. |
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Former Paralegal in Port Saint Lucie, Florida 18 months ago |
Exactly! Thank you for understanding where I'm coming from. I'll probably be taking a big pay cut, but ANYTHING is better than working for those blood sucking, soul crushing attorneys. The money is not worth my sanity. I know of another paralegal who is looking to get out, who says she'd rather be working as a bagger at Publix! |
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Domestic Legal Underling in Severna Park, Maryland 18 months ago |
I was laid off a little over a week ago. Yay! After dealing with hideous paranoid people, I finally got the axe, and while I coulda collected UIB, I saw an ad for a nonprofit, and even though it was temporary, I applied, and got it... and I love it. Everyone is so nice. I keep trying to get used to it. It's like I'm on a team, not some sort of maid serving the various attorneys and office managers and queen-like incompetents who've been there for years because they're back-stabbing paranoid soulless tools or glottuns for punishment... my very soul has been saved, and so has yours! Knowing I no longer feed off the carrion of a dead marriage (domestic law) is wonderful... I now help people live independently, I don't bill people indiscriminately... it's good. |
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Confi in New York, New York 18 months ago |
Interesting discussion about Lawyers.
Another experience was with a Fortune 500 with a Gov't Relations office conveniently located between 1600 Penn and the Congress.
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Former Paralegal in Port Saint Lucie, Florida 18 months ago |
I keep trying to get used to it. It's like I'm on a team, not some sort of maid serving the various attorneys and office managers and queen-like incompetents who've been there for years because they're back-stabbing paranoid soulless tools or glottuns for punishment... Isn't it amazing that you actually have to get used to working with good, decent people? I could not stand to think of myself turning into one of those nasty, miserable women I worked with. It seems like the only way you can actually get ahead in the legal field is if you are one of them - a back-stabbing, selfish, bitchy, money grubbing, ass-kisser of a person. |
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tessie425 in New York, New York 18 months ago |
I started this thread some time ago and am not surprised to see all the responses, esp. people who seem to being going through the same hell that I am working with crazy law firm people....:) Very happy to see that many people are getting out of this field. Definitely the right move. There is nothing but misery and stress in law (the majority of the time). I plan on leaving soon, unfortunatley not too many opportunities have come up for me. I am sticking it out for now. Wish me luck and good luck to all of you... |
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Donna in Brooklyn, New York 8 months ago |
it seems to me that everyone takes orders from the bosses and they do what they are told. Then we you don't go to the parties for holiday anymore, they wonder why? Women are two faced and the attorney are so afraid you will get praised for your job and not them. They are self absorbed and they smile in your face and when you leave the room they complain of you. I had my manager tell me I am "intentionlly rude" to people and everyone is complainng. Now if they ever saw my bad side they would be sorry they knew my name. I laugh they are all a bunch of drunks anyway who have to swallow so much office dysfunction and they cannot do anything for fear of losing their own job. they are only happy to lash out in the bar about how everyone else in the company does nothing. I worked with all female attorney and they all thought they were high and mighty but actually they had no social skills and could not look me in the face for they lied so much it was killing them. |
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Donna in Brooklyn, New York 8 months ago |
I wonder how the attorneys feel now that they have to get off their high horse and type their own work on the internet. See they liked us when we were needed to do their work before the recession and then they suddenly complain about us for no reason now why? because they are told they have to turnaround their work on the internet themselves. SO we are being banned in the legal secy field because the atty's have to do their own work. Now they have to do their own work and they can see how much we did actually do for them. ONe thing is for sure "Karm" who ever does evil will get it back later tenfold... |
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